Q&A: Balancing Life and School with a baby

I browse like twice a day on Yahoo Answers looking for questions that I can help with. I think of it as my good deed of the day. Once I find a question that I can relate to and help with, I respond, with the best of my knowledge of course, and hope it helps. After a while, If the person likes my answer or if it helps, I normally get voted Best Answer. The questions I then post here are one's I received Best Answer for.

So heres the question:

"I just found out I'm pregnant and I am currently in my Sophomore year of college. The father and I live together and I know he'll be around to help, but I'm still worrying about how to balance everything. Any advice Please only advice. Thanks."- L****9

My Answer:
"For one it is awesome that the father is eager to help you. Believe it or not I've been told that is hard to find. I was also in a similar situation when I found myself pregnant with my first. I was about to finish my sophomore year when I found out. The going to class pregnant part has it's own challenges however if you fight through them, they are doable. The biggest advice I can give is to search heavily for a good daycare, nanny, or support system that can watch the child if you have to go on campus. I lucked out and only had to put my son in daycare for 1 day, 1 semester, but that isn't always the case. The biggest thing is to plan ahead and remember to take it 1 day at a time!"

To dig into this further. I will say that it was extremely hard. I'm not going to paint some picture where I come out the best mom in the world, with the perfect balance and happiness. There were nights I cried, days I just did not want to get out of the bed and times when seriously I just forgot to eat. However I forced myself through it and finally found my balance. Now with my second baby at home, and my oldest as a toddler it is much easier. There are a few steps I decided to make that made it a bit easier.

First I adapted to my son's sleeping schedule. Ray (my oldest) was sleeping through the night since we brought him home, so it was extremely easy. And in the day if he napped, I napped, when he was up I took those moments to eat, do homework and enjoy leisure time. Sometimes when he would sleep I would get more work done. They tend to sleep every 2-4 hours for about an hour and a half so I got tons done.

Second, I reminded myself that I'm human. Not one of those android moms they show in the commercials. Baby's will cry, so just expected to cry yourself. Postpartum can hit you at any given time so just look out for signs of this and make sure you establish a supporting safety net. My husband was amazing at being there for me. He allowed me to get out and breathe for how ever long I needed without having to worry about the baby's safety. I soon replaced that with actually working at nights. That way I was away from the baby and able to make money to spend on things that would only make me happier.

Third, consider any and every way to make your life easy. So the school I was attending at the time, Georgia State University, didn't offer many online courses or flexibility. I knew that with the complications I was having during the pregnancy that I would need a university that would be willing to work with me. So I transferred to Kennesaw State University whom was use to non-traditional students like myself. I must say out of all the schools I've attended, this university is amazing at understanding that not every student fits into a cookie cutter mold. 90% of the courses I have taken at KSU have been online, so I've been able to stay home with my kids. However when I did have courses that had to be taken in person I did them during the summer, when my sister would stay with me and watch them. Or I brought my oldest to daycare for the given day, which is a whole other experience for another post.

So the best summed up advice I can give is to breathe, remember your human and that it takes time, patience and experience to become a super mom and have a plan A, plan B and even at times a plan C.

Im Back!

So, my life has been a crazy ride! Sorry for the long absence, but I'm finally back in GA, I got an apartment in Atlanta. It feels good to finally be back in Georgia =]. OK so whats new with me since last time.

Well I dating this guy now, "been together" since December (met in December but didn't fully start dating till February). Names Ricky, and things have been going well, a bit better than the last. He actually moved from New Haven to stay with me, and like every relationship we thug and pull, but to be honest, hes one of the best things that's happened to me in a while =].

Also, the piercings finally healed! So has my hair grown out! Under my styles tab is my whole ordeal with this fro. But the swelling in my face is done so I'm super happy. I posted about my piercings under my body mod tab as well since I seem to get questions about those.









Besides that nothing has changed that I find ya'll would want to read. I'm still the same ole gal from before. Just with more time to post =].

New Dimple Piercings

So, I finally decided to ignore all the terrible horror stories and get my dimples pierced. After three years of thinking, and not thinking and re thinking, I decided hey... I'm only this beautiful once? So I decided to go to Sacred Tattoo in New York, New York, it was like an hour and some drive, but soooo worth it. I called around TONS of places before deciding on this place. The owner, Kevin is fucking amazing. Very helpful and just an awesome personality in person. And my piercer Starr Brew was epic. She was funny, down to earth, and answered all my questions and concerns. Now I would never go to a dirty shop... but I have to state that this shop was beyond clean. It's like an old three story building right off of Canal Street, the shop was located on the second floor, and the third floor was a gallery with art and exhibits, how sick is that? The dimples ran me about $83, but for the quality of the shop id pay more =]. So of course I took picture, and of course everyday if I can, I will post pictures of my face as it begins to heal =]

This is a quick shot of me getting it done.

Unlike my Monroe and the left side of my cheek, my right side bleed so much, we had to gaze it twice, it wasn't bad, as much as when i left, since its like 30 degrees here it was drying the crusted blood to my face, and new piercing =/. And by god it swell... I think the barbell we placed inside of it was either 3/8 or 5/8, honestly I do not remember haha I can find out though upon request though. But the right side swelled alot before i slept, I was scared that it was going to swell over the ball, which some people have had happen... **which if your piercing does so you want to go back to your piecer ASAP**, but as I woke up it was back to the normal swelling....

So this is me at Day 2:

Cheeks still swollen, not a bunch of pain, actually none at all haha just discomfort. I'll keep ya'll updated, but if you have any questions or concerns or anything around those lines, don't be scared to IM me or comment or shot me an email =]. I'm glad to answer like anything haha.

Q&A: Is it a good thing to have big or "pouty" lips?

I browse like twice a day on Yahoo Answers looking for questions that I can help with. I think of it as my good deed of the day. Once I find a question that I can relate to and help with, I respond, with the best of my knowledge of course, and hope it helps. After a while, If the person likes my answer or if it helps, I normally get voted Best Answer. The questions I then post here are one's I received Best Answer for.

So heres the question:

Is it a good thing to have big or "pouty" lips?

"I know random question, but my friends are always telling me I have pouty looking lips. My bottom lip Is bigger then my top so it looks pouty? Some people say it is good to have them. But my friend said I have "black peoples" lips. Sorry I think it is mean what she said and didn't mean to offend anyone if I did:)"- A*****a

And here is my answer:

"I use to get picked on about my lips by my black and white friends. I also have full lips. Guys LOVE them though, so I say love em haha. Make sure though if your face is skinnier or not as round as most, and you want your lips to not look as big, to just ALWAYS use lip liner... then put on your lipstick if you wear it or lip gloss, and make sure you dress well according to your lips. Seems crazy and all... but trust me... how you do your hair or makeup makes a huge difference.. it can be the difference between big over plumped lips or amazing full lips.. I always say.. love what you have, and if you hate it, make it unique or likable. Hope that helps =]"

To further expand on what I was trying to share with A*****a. How things, like your lips, look on your face does correspond with how you carry yourself. Its as if you wear your hair short, long, up or down. For example,the first picture is me with my hair long and down, and the second is a picture of my hair short.

My lips, to me, seem to look fuller when my hair is down and is close to my face. I hate this look so much. While with my short hair my upper lip always looked smaller and slimmer than my bottom which i hated so much more. After sitting, and thinking for a while as to what the heck to do, I decided this was the best way to wear my hair:

By adding hair i now had a different look. If you see every single picture displays slightly different lips. The first one is huge and plump, the second is disproportional, and the last, is what i basically try to make my lips look everyday.